i forgot how fucking hot noel fielding is dressed up as a chick in journey to the centre of the punk. & it's funny, 'cos it doesn't really look all that different to his back-combed, lip-glossed, everyday get-up. gnargh. i well fancy him. like every other girl on the planet. but i was listening to the audio commentary on electro earlier, with noel chattin' about how everyone's mum fancied julian when he was all eightiesd-up in his purple suit, & i am obviously just like everyone's mum, because man, that slo-mo, smokin' shot as he comes into the frame is pretty much my favourite shot of the whole episode. except for the one where the robots in their neon gear pin electro-girl!vince to the wall & dee pulls a knife on him. nyark.

that was an incredibly pointless paragraph. this next one is more of the same: i am so fucking predictable. i got so fuckin' excited the first time i saw electro because synthesisers MAKE my LIFE, & it was the same in flight of the conchords, in the hair-gel episode where they sing fashion is danger because it was all makeup & synths & posing. posing - posing a threat! i have a completely unironic 80s-electro itunes playlist, & both of those songs are on it. doesn't matter that it's a parody of the genre - i will genuinely enjoy that.

so, future sailors dvd comes out monday omgggg. i shoulda just got my arse to town on the day to pur-chase the damn thing, but i got over-excited & ordered it online, so what with postal fuck-ups & the inevitable delivery problems there will be when there's no one in the house to sign for the package, it's probably gonna be aaaages 'til i get it. i'm so fucking excited though - you know when you have a craving for something, a tv show or a film, so you try to satisfy the urge by watching the closest thing to what you want as many times as possible during the lead-up to the something's release? like the time my sister & i were waiting for the two towers to come out, so we watched nothing but the fellowship of the ring (on video tape!) every single weekend (both days) for two months (yeah) until it came out. i was doing that today with the boosh, obsessively watching my favourite eps over as i twitch in anticipation of the dvd.

so. good times. except for the massive pile of wank work i have to do for soon, & am steadfastedly ignoring because fuuuuuck do i hate this fucking english course. if only i could just tell my english lit lecturers to suck it & spend all my time writing poetry instead & getting graded for the creative writing stuff rather than this horrifically boring shit about heteroglossia & 18th century child illegitimacy. pshhkaow. is the sound of a gunshot to the head.

think happy thoughts, people.

i have made no post of substance for a long time.

just got back from Sonisphere Festival. it was something of a last minute plan; didn't have the money to go, but then the BFF won a pair of tickets, & being an amazing best friend, took me with her. this meant that i could see The Used (oh, The Used) & watch Nine Inch Nail's last ever show. other bands that were watched & enjoyed included: Thunder (surprise!), Bullet For My Valentine, Taking Back Sunday (no one told me Adam Lazzara was such a mincer), Anthrax, Linkin Park, Attack Attack (chubby, welsh, kick-ass), Feeder, Buckcherry, Killing Joke (80s goth-indie genius) & Metallica. lolz were provided by Limp Bizkit & Bjorn Again (James Hetfield personally invited them, what).

being in a crowd of manly metalhead men was an interesting experience. atmosphere was laid-back & friendly in a back-slapping, beer-swilling sort of way, but being an emo fag is probably not a wise move. headlining the comedy tent was a man called Andrew O'Neill in a bullet belt & Slayer t-shirt who suprised me & everybody by off-handedly mentioning that we was a transvestite ("although i prefer the term gender spastic"). cue the drunken calls from the back of the room of "fuck off, batty-boy" & i thought, what a shame, that there are very few groups of 'alternative' people who accept someone who's alternative in a different way to them. you're not an anarchist, you're just a tool.

but the festival was awesome, & i proper enjoyed camping. our tent neighbours were nice, & not running around setting fire to things like the oh-my-god-a-weekend-away-from-the-parents type of teenagers that make Reading Festival so dodgy. lots of ageing rockers with wrinkled tattoos wandering around, & younger, greasy-haired metallers in Iron Maiden t-shirts who look like they probably stay at home reading comic books most days. the assault of two days' worth of chunky riffs, testosterone-fuelled roars & six-minute guitar solos kind of made my head spin, but it was good fucking fun.

& hey, last ever Nine Inch Nails show. it was weird. they kicked off with Wish, which had everyone lunging into the pits, but then slowed it right down with some noodling on the keyboard, follwed by The Wretched which is awesome, & one of my favourite NIN songs, but isn't really one you can mosh to. Then there was more noodling, lots of Trent doing some heavy breathing & sweating buckets through his t-shirt, & at that point, the tentative circle pits had faded away & people just stood & watched. it never got loud, or angry, again after that. there was Something I Can Never Have, Lights In The Sky & the set finished off with Hurt. everyone just listened quietly & fuck if i didn't feel something inside breaking when he sang "if i could start again, a million miles away". there were tears.

i couldn't face buying a 'wave goodbye' NIN tour t-shirt after that, but i did instead get a t-shirt with a zombie My Little Pony on it instead. i saw it hanging out in one of the stalls in the arena & i thought, fuck. it might as well have my name on it.

so that was that. now i'm back home & aching all over, but MCR have new songs flitting about the webz & my Who Killed Amanda Palmer book came in the mail this morning. summer continues to pad along, unperturbed.

new default icon

a whole post for this

lol

[eta] just finished watching the borrowers. tiny tom felton. i am so happy in simple ways.

okay so All Time Low released a new video & it has made me angry

this post would be in all caps, but it wouldn't be enough to express my rage at the sheer, unadulterated misogyny that oozes from this piece of crap

rage, okay? rage

just this stuff. about sluts & groupies & it's just - not right. & made worse by other girls hating on the girls they call sluts & the ridiculising of groupies as girls who just wanna fuck someone famous or get rich. what the fuck.

i think the most remotely intelligent thing any male musician ever said about groupies was Will Sheff from Okkervil River:

Being a groupie is, in some ways, just an extreme form of fandom. I think that everyone has experienced, on some level, the emotion that motivates you to be a groupie. Groupies are also regularly disrespected, but all it is is somebody who loves something so much that they get involved with it sexually. Or maybe it doesn't even have to do with sex. I have felt a sense of fandom for things that I have loved that is so intense that it starts to bleed into spirituality, bleed into sexuality, and bleed into all kinds of areas of your life that love for a simple rock album should not be occupying.

being a girl is hard work, yo, when idiots like All Time Low are playing their bullcrap pop-punk all over the scene. fuck that shit seriously. & they have stupid hair.

it was a mistake to get into this at 3am, man. i'm too angry to sleep. it's times like these when gway's slurred ramblings about punching shitty-ass dudes in shitty-ass rock bands in their fucking faces make me so ridiculously glad to be involved in that side of fandom, where there's not so much hatin' on vaginas.

okay - fanfiction writers, or MCR fans in general. how do you reconcile this side of frank iero:



with the side of him that says things like this:

FrankIero: To the two screaming prick faced toddlers who ruined my viewing of transformers last night, your mother should have sat on a coat hanger. Xo

i mean, i don't consider myself to be uber-PC or anything, & innappropriate humour is kind of hilarious sometimes, but. it's like the character or Frank i had constructed in my mind, who is kind of earnest & pretty sweet - & might have a temper or the occasional bitchfit but is still essentially a nice guy - is completely in opposition to the side of him that comes out on twitter, which seems to be him being kind of an asshole.

& i don't have that much of a problem with assholes, really, as long as they're assholes who make good music & generally seem to have a good heart, even if they are a little bit douchey (Pete Wentz, i'm looking at you). i guess i'm just confused? like, if i'd seen this side of Frank from the start, the side of him that he lets rip in Leathermouth, who yells about setting people on fire & slicing girls up, i might not have such a weird disconnect in my head.

i dunno. it's weird. it's not my place to make judgements about people's characters, especially considering all i've got is a fairly fanfictionalised version of bands, so i'm sure they're way more complex than just 'nice guys' or 'douchebags'. it's just - i didn't really notice that side of frank before. has he just got more angry recently? i guess the whole fandom trope of 'asshole!frank' isn't that far off.

anyway. in other news - i won something in the queerics giveaway! i never win things! how awesome! thanks to everyone who entered; i really enjoyed reading all those entries, & huge thanks to cheshcan for running this, & generally being the mastermind behind the awesomeness of queerics. ♥

~check this out~

okay, you guys are aware of QUEERICS, right? if not, a quick refresher: QUEERICS is a lyric-archiving site with a focus on queer songs that are maybe a bit alternative. cheshcan (who is not german, even if i spell her name wrong when i'm tired) works tirelessly to maintain & update the site, & it's an awesome place to come across new, queer bands, or to give second thoughts to that song you've been listening to for years & never realised was quite so faggy.

anyway, this month, QUEERICS is running a truly kick-ass competition with truly kick-ass prizes. it's really freakin' easy to enter, so there's no excuse not to. just check out THIS ENTRY which has all the information you need to enter, along with exactly what you can win.

not only is this a fun thing to do, but you get to support some awesome, independent, queer artists, which is always good. QUEERICS teamed up with Kara Elizabeth from Team Smile and Nod (check out their music, a really lovely indie-electro queer band) to give away copies of their CD. also taking part is artist Elizabeth Gearheart (blog here) who is giving away, as a prize, a small custom watercolour painting. all of this, i think you will agree, is fucking sweet.

all you gotta do is check out THIS ENTRY. just answer a question in your blogspace of choice, & voila. here is mine:

( queer artist: Indochine )

now you go. you've got until June 28th to enter. go go go! ♥

[ETA] even if you're not entering, PIMP THIS OUT. get the word out on QUEERICS, you guys. it totally deserves attention.

okay, so everything i know about american idol i learnt from my flist, so i'm not totally au fait with the whole thing (who's winning, who's in the final, etc). all i know is that everyone is very excited about a sexually ambiguous guy with black hair who wears makeup, sometimes dresses in drag, & is faggy as hell.

now, if mikey way just twittered saying "did gee's stunt double win american idol?" does that mean that mikey way is essentially saying his brother is a sexually ambiguous guy with black hair who wears makeup, sometimes dresses in drag, & is faggy as hell?

because. that is awesome. (also, clearly true.)

in other news, i went to london, spent the evening in a tiny club with live music, & was generally very uncool in a world of stunning musicians with turquoise dreads & eyeliner. seriously, a place like that, & i'm all "damn, i am not cool after all." it was lovely, though. & someone tied some flowers to my bag while i was watching the band. strange, & nice.

tomorrow, back to london to see motherfuckig counting crows. a band i love, a band i admire, but a band that, somehow, i never thought i'd get to see. they're too epic & beautiful to occur in a sweaty venue with elbows digging into your back. they exist in cd players & videos, in a kind of mysterious, unreachable way. except, tomorrow, they will be in brixton, & i will see them. i am so very much looking forward to this.

time now to continue listening to indochine. oh, that band. republique des meteors is a brilliant, beautiful album, & no matter how old he gets, nicola sirkis will still write queer little songs about cross-dressing. ♥

ARGH

this is me being way late on the whole thing, but i just watched stephen colbert at the white house correspondant dinner in 2006, relentlessy throwing backhanded insults at the bush administration while bush was standing right fucking next to him. AWKWARD ohgod, so awkward. but major respect, huh. & makes me think about how it's pretty good to live in a country where you CAN stand next to the president & rip him a new one.

& my youtube searches reveal to me that jon stewart in 1994 in a leather jacket? is damn fucking hot.

in other news, fuck everything, i belong in the 80s. how i missed placebo doing a cover of Wouldn't it Be Good eludes me entirely. speaking of, if anyone's got the studio version that was a b-side to For What It's Worth & wants to upload it for me, that would be pretty awesome? i know you might've paid for it so don't really want to share, & fair enough, but hey.

open question: if you could live in any era, which would it be? like, where do you think your soul feels comfiest? ancient greece, medieval england, the renaissance, the 60s? mine's obvious, i guess. early 80s, coming off bowie & slipping into electro, with all the gender-benders & synthesisers. it's also a pretty gloomy era in a lot of ways, neon shell-suits aside, & i just feel at home every time i hear those electric drumbeats & keyboards. what i'm doing in a world of indie pop, i don't know.

ahahaha oh dear.

my bigbang has reached almost 10,000 words, but 800 of those words comprise a RE-rewritten start to the story which now invalidates everything that came after, except for maybe one flashback, which i have had written down for months, and was actually the first thing i wrote when i decided i wanted gerard-in-drag!fic.

the problem is writing everything that surrounds it. i have gone through three premise changes now, relocated the fic twice, and spent far too long editing & re-editing lines of dialogue which i will now end up scrapping. man, writing fiction is hard.

so essentially, that's approximately 9000 words and an entire storyline i just binned.

conclusion: suspend disbelief, screw with timelines, & everything is a whole lot simpler. it's only fuckin' fanfiction, after all.

& i'm sick of writing room with a view with a staircase & a pond sort of stories - this one will hopefully be fun. i mean, lyn-z is a bass-toting lesbian in an electro-punk band who's in love with amanda palmer, living statue, street performer & song-writer; pwentz has a bad mullet & a morrissey obsession, an anarcho-glam vegan-protest band & a sparkly, glitterballsuit-wearing boyfriend in the form of vince noir, rock & roll star (all deuteragonist's fault); gerard is a hapless art student, come to london just as the new romantics start to take over, & finds himself caught up in it all. how fuckin' serious can this fic possibly be? answer: not very.

yeah. the problem with something like this is that i'm probably the only one who finds it funny. this is the very definition of self-indulgent, & i might be too embarrassed to submit it in the end, even if, by some miracle, i manage to finish it. (now that i'm back down to 800 words, grr.) plus, i realise that setting it in london is a total fucking cop-out on my behalf, and this has the potential to deviate resoundingly into badfic territory. sigh, sigh, etc.

this was way too fuckin' long-winded. i'm going to bed.

eddie izzard, on being a transvestite:




& my particular favourite image:



i've been reading this book he wrote - not really an autobiography, more just an agglomeration of thoughts, anecdotes & random shit - that jen sent to me as a late xmas present, & it's brilliant. i love this man. i'd never really thought about him beyond the fact that his comedy was fucking genius, but he's fascinating on a personal level, too. &&&& okay, i wrote down, like, every single vaguely relevant bit about his childhood & his cross-dressing & his coming out as research for my gerard-in-drag bigbang. [8416 words. slow-going, & i still doubt i'll finish it in time, but i'm trying.]

in other news, is it fucking lazy to self-plagiariase my own fanfiction for an assignment that involves writing 500 words of an opening scene to a short story? also, when this shit is submitted, they obviously run a plagiarism scan over the electronic submission, & if the fic is online somewhere, the computer'll go HANG ON A MINUTE, I'VE SEEN THIS SHIT BEFORE. i wonder though, does it count as plagiarism if it's your own stuff? & how do you convince someone at university that LOL YES THAT LIVEJOURNAL FULL OF STORIES ABOUT QUEER BOYS IN BANDS is really mine? i have no idea how this shit works. maybe i should ask someone what would happen if, theoretically, this occured. theoretically.

ahahahahaha @ everything. it kind of sucks. but tomorrow? TOMORROW IS THE WATCHMEN TIMES. 4.30 tomorrow, motherfuckerrrrrrs, i'll be in the cinema. FUCK YEAH.

(i so don't have enough icon space, but it has come to my attention that i really need a faggy, fabulous icon for queer content posts. must get on that.)